Today, I'm going to see my Dad. I haven't seen him in 22 years. He's out visiting his sister until tomorrow. Because I was away and busy before that, I was unable to see him before today, and it was just that my brother, who'd been spending time with him, told me that he wanted to see me. He divorced my mom 33 years ago, or something like that. In 1978, I stopped contact with him, but that's another story, nevermind... anyway... Some time after that he moved to Tennessee. I saw him in 1990 briefly when his mother passed away and he came out for the funeral. In 1996, I called him when my great-uncle passed away (as he always loved my great-uncle) and I mentioned to him that I was gay, kinda off the cuff. (which was fine, whatever) I contacted him in 2004 or so, just to say hi and I'm alive. We emailed for a while, sent gifts, etc. Then I guess we both lost interest and I kept in touch with him through my younger brother who seemed more interested in a relationship with his father than I did.
All in all, I don't blame him for anything anymore. I mean, what's the point? What good/bad is it going to do? I really have no interest in a father/son relationship with him, but he is my father. Bottom line is he's my biological father, can't change that at all.
So, I'll make the trek to Sacramento ( 2 hour drive) say hello, catch up, etc, then I'll come home. I don't feel obligated, but I know it's the "right thing" to do. Can't really negate the fact that this man had a part in giving me life.
<and these are the days of our lives>